I am a huge fan of the band Needtobreathe and am currently listening to their new album on repeat. At one of their concerts they made the statement: “We are probably the biggest band that most of your friends have never heard of”. I find this to be true. Only a few of my friends have ever heard of Needtobreathe. Everyone else is missing out.

One complete listen from start to finish of this new album and I was hooked. I first discovered Needtobreathe during college. A friend of mine was pretty much obsessed with Needtobreathe and would blast their songs in the car. This was 2008, and I have been listening to their songs ever since. Prior to their new album, Out of Body, my favorite has always been Outsiders. I still love Outsiders equally, but this new album evokes different feelings in me. It was produced during the pandemic, and I think that all art created from this time in life holds a unique meaning. 

Seasons is one of my favorite songs on the Out of Body album. Texas is currently recovering from a winter weather disaster. The snow started to fall last Sunday morning, and it didn’t completely melt until yesterday – 6 days later. It was beautiful. It transformed Fort Worth, in my opinion. I had never seen such a snow-covered Fort Worth that resembled a ski town as much as it did the past few days. With the beauty came consequences. Temperatures were below freezing for days…and by below freezing I mean down to 1 or 2 degrees. I don’t think my body has ever experienced that cold of temps. Today it got up to 75 degrees. That’s Texas for you. Throughout the past week, though, millions of Texans lost power, water, or both. People died. Some died because they froze to death, some died because they tried to heat their house and either caught it on fire or were exposed to carbon monoxide, and some died in car accidents from the icy roads. I read countless tragic stories over the past week and my heart is heavy. People struggled to feed their kids, fought to keep their family warm, suffered damage to or completely lost their property, and lost loved ones.

In all of the sadness and hardship, Texans came together and helped their neighbor. An HEB in the Austin area gave out free groceries after their power went out. Some opened their homes to strangers. Mobile food pantries and water stations popped up all over the state. People donated blankets, coats, money, food, batteries, flashlights, and countless other supplies to homeless shelters and other organizations in their community. So many people demonstrated love and kindness. You can find even more examples here. I am a Texan at heart and incredibly grateful to call Fort Worth home. I have never been more proud of my community than I am now. The past week was extremely tough, but I am encouraged by the way that everyone worked together to help their neighbor – even in the middle of a pandemic. It has been a challenging year to say the least. This season is longer than we hoped, but we will get through it together.

Today is day 9 of a self-quarantine. My husband was around someone who tested positive for COVID-19, so I was exposed too. I’m sure this has already happened over the course of the past six months, but last Friday it was official and undeniable. I was angry at first. Furious for hours to be quite honest. “Why is this happening now?” I thought to myself. No, I said it out loud. After mourning the loss of socialization for the next 14 days, which also included canceling a dentist appointment that had been on the books for two months and a much needed doctor’s appointment, I got it together. Over a week in, I can honestly say that I have been able to find the silver lining in all of this. The appointments are rescheduled and I am well-rested. Work is picking up and I am ready for it. Over the summer we became more comfortable with many things: going out to eat, spending time with friends and family, shopping, and even a vacation to Colorado. This was a very real reminder that we are not out of the woods yet. Life may feel more “normal” but people are still sick, and it is still okay to slow down.

Today is day 39 (maybe?) of the quarantine. It is Saturday. I am at home in my backyard wearing leggings and a tank top. I have worn leggings and a t-shirt or tank top pretty much every day for the past 39 days, changing my top only when I have a presentation or work event on Zoom and adding earrings to really seal the deal. Yes, I am one of those people who only dresses work appropriate from the waist up these days. It makes me laugh to be honest. I have found so much humor with Zoom and virtual meetings lately! Maybe I’ll write a post about that too. I digress…

Reflecting on the last month+ and thinking about how much the world has changed is somewhat overwhelming. Less than 2 months ago I traveled out of the state for work. I flew twice the week of March 8th, once on the 8th and then back home on Friday the 13th. That was a pivotal week in all of this. Announcements were being made, states were starting to implement restrictions, and everything was changing rapidly. The last time I ate in a restaurant was on the evening of Saturday, March 14th. We now order food for pick-up and hold our breath as much as possible in the grocery store. I only leave the house a few times a week – sometimes to just drive around. The house was my office prior to this pandemic but it feels a bit different now. The things I didn’t like about the house before I now find myself extremely grateful for.

This includes the backyard. I try not to stay inside all day and watch TV, so the backyard has become somewhat of a sanctuary for me. I didn’t hate the backyard before, but I longed for something better. We have no patio, just grass (and lots of dirt), but our little table with 4 chairs in the backyard is where I find myself sitting many hours of the day. I look forward to Saturdays and these hours I can spend reading, listening to music, writing, or sipping on a cocktail. I watch the birds, admire the bright pink roses on the rose bush, and soak up the sunshine.

Two months ago I would not have been able to imagine the current state of the world. I also would not have been able to imagine the joy I find in the simplicity of Saturdays in my backyard. One day life will return to some kind of normal. Our Saturday schedule will be busy again and we won’t have to stay home. In the meantime I plan to cherish quarantine Saturdays, and in the future I hope to not completely lose this slower pace I am growing to love.

There is something so majestic about the sky that I often find myself pausing to stare at the beauty painted before me and admiring God for His artistry. Christmas Day was especially magnificent this year. I had the privilege of witnessing the sunrise and the sunset on December 25th, and I couldn’t help but be in awe of our Creator. Here is a snapshot of the sunrise around 7:00am…

The day began with one of my favorite family traditions. In high school I started going with my dad to cook breakfast for the homeless on Christmas morning. It forever changed my perspective on Christmas and I’m convinced that the experience blessed me more than the homeless people we fed. I missed the past few years but went back this year and don’t want to miss another one.

Later in the day, we drove out to Aledo and this is the sunset that was before us…

Breathtaking! We are so loved by the Lord that He sent His only Son to earth to die for our sins. He makes a point to show us His love all the time. We just have to stop and look up.

You get out of your car to get gas and realize that the nozzle doesn’t reach your tank 

Live music is one of my favorite things.  There is something about it that just draws me in.  Last week I discovered a unique opportunity to experience live music when one of my friends invited me to go to a Sofar concert with her.  If you aren’t familiar with Sofar Sounds, it is an organization that brings live music to cities all over the world.  The gatherings are more intimate and consist of local artists.  You have to sign up for tickets and they draw for who can purchase them. They send out an email the day before letting you know where the concert is.  Last week’s venue was The Post at River East.  This venue was new to me and still unfinished. They are hoping to hold parties and weddings there once it’s complete.  The concert was in the outdoor courtyard and we all sat on the ground.  There were lights strung over our heads from one side of the wall to the other that, combined with the beautiful weather, created a surreal ambience.  We drank our wine and enjoyed the three different artists who shared their talents with all of us that evening.  I will definitely go to another and am looking forward to learning about a new venue in my city.  

The first things I think about most mornings are my upcoming tasks and stressors for the day.  Yesterday’s troubles come back to me and I am immediately in a place of worry and fear.  This is no good. This is not what God wants.  God is waiting for me to talk to Him as soon as I wake up.  God wants to carry my burdens for me so I can walk lightly through the day.  He wants me to trust in Him and stay in constant communication with Him.  If I do this, I am bringing Him glory and remaining in a place of mindfulness.  I have more control over my thoughts and can face each obstacle with confidence.  God blesses me each day. We can truly find Heaven on earth when we walk with the Lord.  Don’t miss Him in the morning.  Look for what He wants to show you and teach you in even the smallest of moments.  

When I was in high school, I would walk to the creek in our neighborhood on days when I was stressed out or upset about something.  This creek is hidden from the road.  To get there you have to take a sidewalk that leads into the woods.  A little ways ahead is a clearing where you can see park benches.  Once you see the park benches you know you are almost there.  This spillway is no Niagara Falls, but for an ordinary  Fort Worth neighborhood it is spectacular.  Unexpected beauty.  What I have not mentioned yet is that as soon as you enter the woods you start to hear the noise—the powerful sound of rushing water.  This place is a gem.  I think the best part about it is that you have no idea it’s there until you either hear about it from someone else or randomly stumble upon it.  I find myself drawn to this place even now in my late 20s.  There is something about the peaceful yet loud rush of water that inspires me and calms my soul.

My husband and I actually went there last night.  He had never seen it and I wanted to share this hidden creek with him.  On the walk back to the car, we passed a house (there are many houses that back up to the grassy clearing) with a large covered patio.  We could see the patio from a ways back, but as we grew closer we could hear the singing.  A group of people were standing on the back patio singing worship music.  Someone was playing the guitar too and it was one of the most beautiful things I have heard—a group of people praising the Lord on a gorgeous and quiet Monday night.  This was a perfect, surprising ending to our creek visit and all I could do was thank God for those precious minutes.  I am grateful for that time and continue to treasure this spot.  I won’t be surprised if I find myself drawn to this place throughout my adult life.  Where is your place of reflection and rejuvenation—your hidden gem?

Let’s be honest….Monday is not a day I look forward to.  Sometimes I long for the days when I was in school and Monday was the day I got to see my friends again—or the guy I had a crush on.  After finishing graduate school and beginning to work full time I have come to understand what Mondays mean for many people.  As an adult trying to like and embrace adulthood, Mondays have been a continuous struggle.  Mondays mean that the weekend is as far away as it can be and there are 5 more workdays to trudge through.  I do believe that I need to appreciate each day as a gift (including Mondays) and always look for the positives.  Sometimes on Monday mornings it feels almost impossible to find something good.  Then I remind myself that I actually like my job and maybe it is just the world screaming in my ear that Mondays are terrible.  Regardless, a little happy never fails to brighten a Monday.  Today my little happy was a pair of mint flats.  Sometimes you just need a little happy.

I haven’t written in awhile because I have not felt inspired to write.  

This blog was finally started after my grandmother passed away.  I had been thinking about starting a blog since college, but it was after my grandmother died that I finally said “today is the day”.  Ma was 97 years old when she passed away less than one month ago.  She was my mother’s mother.  I could literally write an entire novel about Ma, her life, and how she inspired me.  She was involved in multiple organizations in Fort Worth during her prime and always stood up for what she believed in.  She is the most amazing woman I have ever known.  She is my hero.  She is my role model.  She is my grandmother and will always be even though she is gone from this world.  I am forever grateful for the time I got to spend with her.  She has inspired me to travel the world and dance and entertain.  She and my grandfather hosted many parties and spent multiple nights a week with their friends and family.  They wanted to be with the people they loved and to have a good time.  Ma loved me so much and made sure that I knew it every time I saw her.  I miss her more than words can say.  There have been ok days and bad days since March 26th, 2016.  Today was a bad day.  I can only be thankful, though, for the time I was able to spend with her.  Many people never get to meet their grandparents or have a relationship with them.  I was blessed to know all four of my grandparents during my childhood and will cherish those memories forever.  Those relationships helped shape me into the person I am today.  Thank you, Ma.